Thursday, January 14, 2016

Can't Afford Kids? Quit Having Kids

Really it's a simple decision. As soon as you release that you can't raise your child independently (financially, physically or mentally), then maybe it's time to stop having babies.
When you won't take your child to the Dr because you can't afford it, you need to stop having babies.
When you look like a hobo that just crawled out of a dumpster because you can't afford new clothes, you need to stop having babies.
When you can't remember the last time you bathed your kids, you need to stop having babies.
God loves children. He hates divorce because he wants godly offspring. However, I truly believe that God does not intend for you to make your children a burden on others. Kids are not little "cuddle buddies." If that's what your looking for them go buy a stuffed animal.
I don't want my kids to be spoiled and pampered children. But I would love to be able to afford to take them to the Dr when they're sick, to look like a human being when I go grocery shopping and maybe even to smell nice. I don't think that's asking too much.
Recently, I sat with a table of 10 other people, two of which were pregnant and  six of which were children all under the age of 4. We hadn't even ordered food yet and 2 of the kids had already thrown up (enough to fill a to go box), 2 more were playing drums on the table with knives, another is having a meltdown about the throw up epsiode, the spouses are becoming irritable with each other and I'm sitting here holding together my sanity by a mere thread.
I realized at that moment that if I had been one of the people at a different table that I would have been appalled and probably would have left the restaurant.
What's wrong with having 1 child? I have heard anything from  "it's selfish" to " you're not a real woman if you didn't have more than 1 child".  Shocked? I was when I heard those things said. I like the idea of pacing myself, not being overwhelmed.
The truth is that it only becomes overwhelming if we allow it to be.
If I have the control I would choose not to overwhelm myself with too many kids at once for the sake of my sanity, the kids sanity, my husband's sanity, my marriage, my spouse, the desire for romance and the well being of my children. Wow! I just gave 7 perfectly reasons why it's OK to pace yourself.
Also, if your kids are sick please don't bring them to a restaurant or anywhere for that matter unless it's the doctor. It's not fair to the child and it is certainly not fair to the innocent people that are involuntarily being subjected to illness.

You Kids Aren't Your " buddies"

I have recently come to realize how many mom's are treating their kids like they're best buds or friends or companions, rather than a parent and their child.
There's nothing wrong with wanting a good relationship with your child but when you've been on more date with ypur child than your spouse, something needs to change.
When you let your child get away with things just because you did it as a child and therefore you think it's cute? Come on really?
While your trying to pursue a friendship with your child, don't forget to do a little parenting as well.